putting the ‘get’ in ‘budget’

I am on a very tight budget for the rest of this month and next–one I have come to commonly refer to as the ‘oops I blew next month’s paycheck and should temporarily reevaluate my aversion to cheap malt liquor’ financial plan.  I will be on this plan starting a week ago, and haven’t had candy in days so you know the situation must be dire.

I struggle with this situation (over and over and over again) because I create a very interesting life for myself, whereby I routinely blow large sums of money on extravagant travel, and am reduced to short periods of abject poverty.  In these moments of poverty I stress out so much that I am forced to purchase expensive clothing and snowboard hardgoods as the only viable means of coping.  Thank goodness Grey’s Anatomy is back on the air so I can now get some good cries in while I’m watching it and simultaneously shopping for just about anything that costs over $200.  It’s an incredible stress reliever, lasting for at least ten minutes until my bank, credit card, or both, texts to let me know that I have exceeded my limit and oh, by the way, the amount I have charged does not exist at this time.  It is at this moment that I begin digging through the closet of purchased goods and clothing I acquired the last time I was stressed out from being on such a restrictive budget, and I think momentarily that I should sell them.  After 30 seconds pass, I realize I haven’t even worn/used half these items, and I put them away to immediately forget about them.  Usually, the cycle only evens out after I’m majorly in debt and have to dig myself out by eating only Ramen and drinking only Franzia for a month–except this month, by Franzia I mean Old English, and by Ramen I mean … no, I mean Ramen.  It doesn’t get much worse than Ramen.


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